Chapter 6
EPOV
“What in the hell are these women thinking? Can I not catch a damn break?” I groaned.
“Sounds like last week’s date didn’t fare any better than the previous two. Come on…spill.” Bill was in my office for our usual Monday morning debriefing of the previous weekend’s date and frankly, he was taking too much damn pleasure in my distress.
I had been on three dates since my decision to attempt a return to the dating scene and each one had been exponentially worse than the one before.
The first date had been with a preschool teacher friend of Amelia’s; well friend may be a bit of a stretch. Put it this way, they were more than just casual acquaintances but they were not so close that it would be weird if we didn’t hit it off. Thank God for that, because we didn’t hit it off. I had really been looking forward to the date thinking her profession would give us something in common, she obviously loves preschoolers and I happen to have one.
I was pleasantly surprised when she introduced herself to me at the restaurant. She
was a petite brunette, very stylishly dressed with beautiful brown eyes, I was thrilled. Then we sat down at the table and suddenly I went deaf. I mean it; I never heard another word she said. If I said “I’m sorry, what?”or “I didn’t catch that” or hell for that matter, “huh?” once, I said it 75 times during the course of our meal. Seriously, I thought something bad wrong had happened to my hearing all of a sudden. At first I thought it was me, but I could hear all the other sounds around me and was reassured when the waitress had to ask her three times to repeat her meal order. It was fucking ridiculous, and the twisted thing about it was she seemed to enjoy me having to ask her to repeat everything she said, it was as if I was being coerced into being attentive. Finally I gave up and just started nodding and saying “uh huh” to everything she said. There’s no telling what in the hell I agreed to that night since I didn’t speak fluent dog whistle.
The second date was just the opposite but equally as disastrous. Where my first date could be drowned out by the sound of snow falling, the next one could be overheard in the next county and what was worse than that was she said absolutely nothing worth hearing.
I was discouraged but not giving up. Amelia was eager to redeem herself and asked for one more chance to set me up. Since I didn’t do the nightclub thing and I had already ruled any co-worker as off limits, I had few options, so I reluctantly agreed to one more try. Third time’s a charm, right?
Amelia knew this lady from the health club, she was one of the trainers and according to Bill had a body to die for though apparently he’d never seen her, he was just basing this on his wife’s detailed description.
“So man, tell me. Was she smokin’ or what?”
“Oh she was smokin’ alright. She was smokin’ something. It had to have been drugs; no person in their right mind would have behaved the way she did with a complete stranger without the assistance of a pharmaceutical. Right?”
“Oh Lord, what happened with this one?” Bill asked. He had begun to sound as resigned as I was that all of these dates were going to end in ruin.
“OK, but this time keep your hysterics confined to this office, I’m tired of my dates being the source of cartoons and office pools by the rest of the staff.”
“I know…it’s really not nice of them to profit from your misery. Bastards!” I shook my head while he sat there and laughed at his own joke.
“Alright, the date started out pretty good. Just like all the other dates, I met Jessica in front of the restaurant and was impressed to say the least. She was just as beautiful as Amelia said she was. Her boobs may have been a little bigger than ideal for me, but other than that she was perfect.” Bill shook his head at the ‘boob’ comment, in his opinion when it came to boobs, there was no such thing as too big.
“We walked in to the restaurant and she was immediately right on top of me, I mean absolutely no concept of personal space at all. Look, I have no problems with PDA but shit, I am a respected attorney in this town and we did just meet; but damn she was hot so I just pushed down my concerns and decided to enjoy it.” Bill wagged his eyebrows and motioned for me to continue.
“Jessica had requested a “private booth” so after a short wait, the hostess escorted us to over and placed a menu on each side of the table. Jessica took a seat, quickly grabbed the menu from the other side and instructed me to sit beside her rather than across from her… well you know that’s a pet peeve of mine. Normally the only people sitting on the same side of the booth are people that really have no business out in public because they’re all over each other. Besides that, it kinda throws off my sense of balance.” Bill laughed, my OCD tendencies had been the topic of more than one discussion.
“Anyway, I debated internally for a few seconds and decided it wasn’t worth making her feel uncomfortable over, so I sat down beside her. I was still looking at the menu when I felt it…she put her tongue in my ear!” I thought Bill was going to spew his coffee.
“No wait, it gets better.” I paused, waiting for him to regain his composure. “By the time the waiter appeared with our salads, she was practically in my lap, he had barely turned around after putting them on the table when I felt her hand land squarely on my junk.” Bill was in full on hysterics at this point.
“Shut up, you ass! And tell that wife of yours that she is done! I don’t know what sadistic game she’s been playing, but it’s over now!” I was trying my damnedest to sound menacing but the laughter was making it a hard sale.
“So what are you going to do now, man?” Bill said between the laughter.
I cursed my own arrogance for thinking that just because I had finally decided to date again that somehow a line of women would form at my office door that I would just make my selection from.
“I don’t know, I guess it will all work out somehow. Hell, Sookie’s even offering to set me up.”
“Really? With who?”
“I don’t know…she says there are a couple of professors that are friends of hers that she wouldn’t mind setting me up with.”
“You going to do it?”
“Maybe. Couldn’t be any worse than Amelia’s picks, could it?”
“God, I hope not.” He said sympathetically.
~o~O~o~
“Come on Eric, she’s a nice girl…very good looking…and she’s educated…with no apparent ‘junk grabbing’ tendencies.” Sookie tried to contain her giggle.
We had just finished dinner and she and I were clearing the table and loading the dishwasher when she brought up her professor friends again.
“What do you have to lose, except for maybe your virtue.” She wasn’t even trying to contain her laughter any more.
Sookie and I had slipped into an easy friendship over the last few weeks. On Sunday nights when she’d return from her weekend she’d usually join me in the living room for a glass of wine. Holly would already be in bed so we’d talk about our weekends and she’d ask for the ugly details of that week’s dating calamity.
She loved to torment me with whatever tidbits she was able to glean from our conversations and her harassment knew no bounds. This was apparent when I came in the kitchen one morning after telling her about the date with the “dog whisperer” and she and Holly were sitting at the table eating their breakfast, both of them were moving their mouths as if they were carrying on a conversation but no sound was coming out. Yep, the little hussy would stop at nothing, including enlisting the help of my daughter, if it meant she could take a shot at me.
“Ok…ok…set something up and I’ll go, but I swear if she tries to molest me or begins talking incessantly about her mother’s IBS or something equally ridiculous, I’m coming home and kicking your cute little ass out.” I told her, she just shook her ass and laughed.
“Relax Eric; you’ll have fun, trust me.”
The next day Sookie called her friend Pam to make sure she was interested and gave her a heads up that I would be calling her to arrange a day and time.
After speaking to Pam on the phone, I had to admit I was intrigued. She had been witty, intelligent and basically everything Sookie said she would be. We set a date for Saturday night and I was honestly looking forward to it. Things were definitely looking up.
I got home Friday night surprised to find Sookie in the kitchen cooking. Traditionally Friday night was “date night” for me and Holly to spend some time together while Sookie took off to spend her weekend with Sam.
“Hey, to what do I owe this surprise?” I asked as I walked in the kitchen.
“Oh, I hope this is ok. Sam is out of town on business this weekend and Holly mentioned she wasn’t feeling well, so I figured I would cook dinner tonight.” She sounded worried that I would be put out by her decision.
“No, that’s fine. Is Holly ok?” My immediate concern was for my daughter.
“Yeah, it may be the beginning of a bug or something but honestly I just think she’s tired. I sort of wore her out today dragging her from pillar to post running errands.” She said sheepishly.
Before I could go to check on Holly my phone rang.
“Hey man, what’s up?” I asked Bill.
I listened as he told me that Amelia had not been feeling well for the last couple of days and after going to the doctor today they determined that she had the flu so she would be unable to babysit Saturday night.
“No problem man, don’t worry about it. I’ll just postpone the date. Give Amelia my love and tell her I hope she feels better soon.” I said before closing my phone and turning back to Sookie.
“Well, looks like I’ll have to call Pam and postpone, Amelia has the flu.”
“Oh no you don’t mister,” came Sookie’s response, “I’ll watch Holly. You go on your date.”
“Sookie, that’s sweet but this is your time off, you don’t need to be worry about Holly. It’s not a big deal, I will just reschedule for another time.”
“Eric, I have no plans for the weekend so there’s no reason for you to change your plans. Holly and I will have a girl’s night. We’ll go out to eat and to the movies or something.” She offered.
“Why are you pushing so hard for me to go on this date?” I asked warily.
Suddenly Sookie’s expression changed and she became very serious.
“You deserve to be happy Eric and I think Pam may be able to make you happy.” I was stunned; this was not the response I was expecting and I certainly didn’t know how to respond back.
I pulled her to me, gave her a quick hug and whispered.
“Thank you.”
~o~O~o~
I was cautiously optimistic that first night, I had really enjoyed talking to her on the phone but would she measure up in person? I decided, in light of my last date, a change of venue would be appropriate so she met me in front of the new Italian place a few blocks over from the office. As I was walking toward the restaurant and
I saw her before she noticed me giving me the opportunity to unabashedly look her over. She was tall, much taller than anyone I could recall ever dating and I would be lying if I said it didn’t intimidate me just slightly.
I walked up and introduced myself and greeted each other like old friends. We talked about general topics such as music, literature and even sports and I was stunned by the broad range of knowledge she had as I peppered her with question after question. The conversation flowed freely all evening, there were no awkward silences or lulls and I quickly found myself wanting to see her again.
By the second date it had become a habit to either text or speak to each other by phone almost daily and the conversations became more and more personal. I was surprised when I found out Pam was a Professor of Geological Sciences; I had assumed her connection to Sookie had been through classes but apparently that was not the case. It was then I realized how little Sookie had actually told me about Pam.
“Then you and Sookie never had class together?” I asked as the waiter brought out another glass of wine for the both of us.
“No,” she laughed, “I think Sookie is an English or Journalism major or something like that my…classes are definitely not part of that curriculum.”
“No, I suppose not.” I chuckled with her.
“She and I met in the library late one evening and became fast friends after that.”
“So, what did Sookie tell about our relationship?” I asked curious about how Sookie described me.
I saw her stiffen a little and adjust her posture so that she was sitting a little straighter in the chair.
“Just that you were a friend of hers. Why? Are you an ex-boyfriend or something?” I could see she was really getting uncomfortable.
“No, no…Nothing like that.” I mentally played back all of our previous conversations and paused as it hit me, she probably doesn’t know I have a child! I took a deep breath before spitting my next sentence. “Sookie’s my nanny.”
If she was uncomfortable before, she was downright miserable now. She looked down at her wine glass for a few moments before picking it up to take another swallow, her eyes never leaving the glass. Finally, after what seemed like forever, she spoke without looking up at me.
“Do you have a boy or girl?”
“Little girl.”
“How old is she?”
“She’ll be five in a couple of months.”
I could feel myself getting defensive. I didn’t know whether to be pissed at Sookie for not giving her a heads up or pissed at myself for assuming she knew. I knew Pam was trying to process the information she had just been given but her reaction was definitely not the one I was hoping for.
“Pam, if this is going to be an issue, I need to know now.”
“Well, I’ll admit this was not something I was expecting. And don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t like kids, it’s just that I’ve never been really good with them.”
“Did you ever see yourself having children in the future?” If neither of us had children this would never be a conversation I would have at this stage of the game,
but since I did have one, I felt it was a fair question.
“Honestly Eric, I don’t know, but I do know that I like you enough to consider it.”
SPOV
After finding out that Eric had begun dating, Sam seemed to be less antagonistic about my job settling into a quasi state of acceptance. I knew he still wasn’t happy about it but at least he no longer voiced his dissatisfaction.
The fighting had stopped but surprisingly, I still had this uneasy feeling when I got to Sam’s on the weekends. I had fooled myself into believing that as soon as he came to grips with my new job we would go back to being happy like before but now I was having a hard time remembering when we were happy. Oh stop it Sookie! You know you were happy once.
I cursed my impatience vowing to give our relationship the time it needed to heal from the previous strain.
TBC
